And if I have to fall, then it won't be in your line*

So, exciting things are happening in V’s world. Exciting things that almost distract her from the fact that the anniversary of her semester abroad is rapidly approaching… (As I recently bemoaned this fact with sad eyes and a cup of tea, my mother stated, “It really is like a break-up, isn’t it?” I’ve not had any experience with those, but I suppose so.) These exciting things are also quite terrifying, considering they involve me growing up, doing things, and just generally being active in my life, rather than my calm, passive approach.

So let’s look at them in chronological order of “needs to be addressed”:

First exciting thing: I’ve been accepted to an archaeological field school in Romania (technically Transylvania), excavating a medieval funerary site. I was absolutely dumbfounded to hear I’d been accepted, but now I have a week and a half to decide if the insane amount of money is worth going to Romania to dig. (To be honest with you, I’ve already made my decision, but my guilt over not being practical is what’s holding me back right now.)

Second exciting thing: my professor D., who I was doing research with last semester, has invited me to be on a panel for the NEAA (Northeastern Anthropological Association) conference in late Feb-early March, on the topic of undergraduate research opportunities. I am excited but it’s also scary. This isn’t my research paper on Oscar Wilde from high school; it’s not just a compilation of someone else’s work. It’s my own thoughts and observations and my way of trying to make sense of it. I’m scared. What if they don’t like it? What if they think I’m dumb? This is my first experience in this. I don’t actually know what I’m doing.

Third exciting thing: I’m graduating in May. Oh my god. Talk about a terrifying exciting thing.

I’m really excited, but really nervous for this semester. Big things are happening and I’m taking exciting classes and I’m networking and I’m doing things with possible impacts for my future, but sometimes that’s more scary than exciting.


*Black Sheep -Gin Wigmore